Sunday, May 14, 2017

Happy Mother's Day

I hope that your Mother's Day is joyful for you, but I know there are other mothers out there like me where Mother's Day is painful.  The joy in my day has come from my grandsons Everett & Myles and my sweet daughter in-law.

There is currently so much going on (of which I cannot yet speak of) that my heart is broken.  If you are shedding tears at this Mother's Day, please know that you are not alone.  May our Lord bless you and keep you and comfort you in every way with His perfect love.
   

Thursday, May 4, 2017

Life Struggles

Its been a long time since I last wrote because I have been in somewhat of a slump.  Mark and I have had one virus after another.  Just when we are getting over one another one hits.  On top of that I have been watching children 4 to 6 days a week.  There is a lot of other stuff sandwiched inbetween that I keep private.  I will just say that life has been stressful.

I don't quite know how to put into words the next thing I want to talk about.  It is really hard to deal with.  As you may know Mark & I adopted two boys because I was unable to have children due to endometriosis.  The adoption date was January 8, 1998.  Well, both boys are in their 20's and living on their own now.  The oldest boy lives nearby and I babysit his two boys 4 to 5 days a week.  The 2nd boy moved to another state where he got in contact with his birth family.  Since doing that he has dropped all contact with me & my hubby.  He still keeps in touch with my older son (his brother), but not with us.  Basically, he has dumped us and gone back to his birth family.

On top of that, we have not found another church.  Finding that with what is going on in the world these days it is hard to be a follower of Jesus.  If we hear about a good church it always ends up being quite a distance away.  Also, since we keep getting sick it makes it hard to go.  Neither of us feels up to dealing with a new situation when we are sick.  So we have been content to continue with on-line church.  We've gotten more involved with our on-line church and its been pretty wonderful.  It has been wonderful to get good Bible teaching and be drawn into a closer walk with Jesus.  However, I was lonesome for our old church one day and checked out the newletter.  I noticed that the women did not end up going to that IF conference.  So I got excited and wondered if some good changes had occurred.  So I listened to a current sermon on the podcast only to find out how much more deeply the head pastor has gotten into the emerging church stuff.  And then all the people that I have warned have not heeded my warning and are still there listening to what is being taught.  So that is another reason I have been depressed.

So that is my update.  Even though there has been hard stuff, there has been good stuff too, for which I am thankful.  God is so good, He's so good to me.

Friday, March 10, 2017

Life and Dishes

Last night one of Mark's friends from our old church called and they talked about the church and why Mark left.  And I wrote an email to another one of our friends that wrote and said they missed us at church.  I told them that we have left the church and why.  All I can do is pray people will have their eyes opened.  Lately, I have been feeling like I am the one that has gone astray.  There are so many people that are blind I feel there is something wrong with me. 

Otherwise I have been taking each day as it comes, doing the best I can and confessing my mess ups.  Every week is really busy with the children and I get so tired at the end of the day.  Right now Everett is potty training and it is hard work.  Then on top of that Myles is starting to creep around and get into things.  And then there is my schedule, when I work and for how many hours varies week to week so it is hard to make plans.  But when the kids are here we follow the same schedule and they love it.

In my down time I've been shopping both in store and on-line.  Or turning on a chick flick and eating potato chips late at night when I get the TV to myself.  Funny thing about the potato chips is that I swore off them off years ago.  However, my hubby didn't, so there has always been potato chips around.  It hasn't been till recently that I crave them.  And then too we've gotten into eating ice cream.  Tillamook makes wonderful ice cream and my favorite Tillamook flavor is Malted Moo.

The other day I had a burst of energy and began cleaning out my kitchen cupboards.  I am a dish hound and have collected up many dishes through the years. Well, I've decided that I need to let go.  Some of them are heavy and if not careful they will chip.  I no longer find myself using them because of it.  In my old age I much prefer Corelle which is lighter and doesn't chip.  I recently ordered a new Corelle pattern called Garden Lace (pictured below).

The turquoise color and the pattern around the rim is what attracted me.  I feel I can have these pretty dishes around children and not worry.  Since entering the "Grandma stage" my house has taken on a new decor.  Colorful plastic dishes, sippy cups and bottles in the kitchen.  In the living room a tent, toy box and stuffed animals along with finger prints on the TV screen and a pack of Boogie Wipes. And in the dining room a mini table and chairs, a play kitchen and a high chair.  Its not a designer's dream, but it certainly is child friendly and its home. 

Monday, March 6, 2017

Update

Well, it is very windy here today, gusts up to 60 mph.  Denver is in a drought.  We have hardly gotten any snow this winter.  It has been windy and oh so dry.  I had Mark put food out for the critters last night and a Robin showed up while I was getting dinner ready in the kitchen.  In Colorado that means spring is coming early.  Plus my bulbs in the front yard flower beds are coming up.  The green months here are short. The barren look hangs around for at least 6 months (if not more) and that's half the year.  I can only hope that we get lots of rain because snow will hurt the blooming things as it did last year.

Well, to update on the church situation, we have not even been to a new church.  We have had sickness after sickness.  We can only figure it is the Lord's will for us right now.  If I'm not sick Mark is.  This past weekend I caught a bug my son and grandsons had and I was so sick.  Thankfully this morning I am feeling well enough that I will be able to handle the kiddos.  Anyway, the first Sunday we left the church we took a day to ourselves.  We felt we needed a break after all the heartache, I called it a mental health day.  It was a beautiful day, no snow, just sunshine and warm air so we took advantage of it.  Ever since that day we have been sick and the only other thing was our grandson's birthday party which we had on a Sunday so his daddy could come (because he works on Saturdays).  So we have been doing on-line church.  A church called The Superior Word in Florida has become our home on-line church.  We love Pastor Charlie and this last Sunday he shared our profile write up with everyone which was very sweet.  And we watch other churches as well.  We don't have the physical fellowship, but we are sure being fed.

As far as our old church, a friend called me and let me know that we have left a hole.  She said we are really missed.  And she said that other people are starting to question what the pastors are doing. She said that they are really pushing the small groups and starting to push the purpose driven stuff in the sermons.  Me and my friend cannot believe why these pastors are doing this when they are supposed to know the word so well.  While praying the answer came to me:  "Because they are following a man and not "me".  My friend asked me to pray for her and others in the church.

Friday, February 24, 2017

Life Update

Its been a little over a month since I last wrote.  I've been thinking about posting, but haven't been in a mood to chat simply because I've been so down about our church going astray.  It's been interesting watching the goings on from afar as we still get the church's weekly newsletter.  I opened one of the letters one day and that set me back.  Its been hard and I've been tempted (just being honest).  Mark said he reads the newsletter just as confirmation. The other day he told me that this year the ladies ministry is not having the usual women's retreat, but are instead going to an IF Gathering.  I would definitely not participate in that and you can read about the dangers of IF at Truthkeepers and Lighthouse Trails.

Wow!  Thinking back, I remember getting that call to be a leader in women's ministry.  It was something I had thought about, to play a bigger role.  I could have said "yes" thinking it was totally of the Lord that I was being asked, but instead my first response was that I needed to pray about it, which was good.  When I went to the Lord I heard nothing, which basically means "wait".  I got counsel from my husband, which he said I am too busy, which I am.  There was a deadline of giving an answer.  In between that time of being asked and giving an answer, I was bombarded with guilt at not doing my part, not trusting God to open the time up, blah blah blah.  Well, as you may know from reading my prior post, I declined the position and I am now glad I did.  The leading of the Holy Spirit is so soft and gentle, as in that verse:  1 Kings 19:12 "a still small voice" (KJV).

What's been so hard about this whole apostasy thing is watching people I thought were strong in the Lord peel off in this apostate direction.  And when you tell them the dangers of it, they pay you no mind.  So I am losing friendships.  Again the words of that song:  All to Jesus I surrender, all to Him I freely give.  I will ever love and trust Him in His presence daily live.  There is a cost to following our Lord, as he described in Luke 14:26-27 and Matthew 10:37, we have to love Him first and most and that may cause problems in our other relationships.

Otherwise, life has been busy as usual taking care of children.  Its a blessing, but my emotions have not been in the best way.  I think I may be under spiritual attack as I have been depressed and irritable more so than usual.  And have had more than my share of viruses.  Ugh!  I hosted a big party for my dear Everett, who turned 3 on Valentine's Day.  It was a great party and I felt like the Lord spoke to me saying "this is your mission field" as I looked at all the guests.  All these young people that don't know him.  Well, this is all for now.  May the Lord bless you and keep you. 

Sunday, January 22, 2017

New World Order or Jesus?

If you are a servant of Jesus Christ you need to be on your guard.  Why?  Because there is a spiritual battle going on.  The spirit of anti-christ is moving about in our churches.  Granted, this has been going on for years, but recently the pace has stepped up.  Apostasy is defined as the abandonment of a previous loyalty.  This enemy spirit that lurks in our churches is seeking to have us abandon our Lord Jesus and pledge loyalty to Anti-Christ. Jesus says in Rev. 2:4...Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love.  This enemy spirit is dressed in sheep's clothing.  It has the look of goodness, but is devoid of the power of God.  This enemy lurks about with various names such as:  Purpose Driven, Emergent, New Apostolic Reformation, etc.

Below are Biblical warnings:

Matthew 24:4-5 says..."And Jesus answered and said to them: “Take heed that no one deceives you.  For many will come in My name, saying, ‘I am the Christ,’ and will deceive many." KJV

1 John 4:1 says..."Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world."  KJV

2 Thessalonians 2:2-4 says..."Now, brethren, concerning the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ and our gathering together to Him, we ask you, not to be soon shaken in mind or troubled, either by spirit or by word or by letter, as if from us, as though the day of Christ had come. Let no one deceive you by any means; for that Day will not come unless the falling away comes first, and the man of sin is revealed, the son of perdition, who opposes and exalts himself above all that is called God or that is worshiped, so that he sits as God in the temple of God, showing himself that he is God."  NKJV

1 Timothy 4:1 says...“Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils;”  KJV

2 Peter 3:17 says...“Ye therefore, beloved, seeing ye know these things before, beware lest ye also, being led away with the error of the wicked, fall from your own steadfastness.”  KJV

Jude 1:4 says..."For there are certain men crept in unawares, who were before of old ordained to this condemnation, ungodly men, turning the grace of our God into lasciviousness, and denying the only Lord God, and our Lord Jesus Christ." KJV

It is important to be arrayed in our spiritual armor to resist the enemy and his lies.  Here below are some links to very good writing presented by men standing on the "Rock".  Roger Oakland who was recruited by Pastor Chuck Smith to be a part of Calvary Costa Mesa in 1988.  And Paul Smith, brother of Chuck Smith and close friend to Roger Oakland.

The Hijacking of the Calvary Chapel Movement into the Coming One-World Religion

 New Evangelicalism: The New World Order (by Paul Smith)

Certain Men Crept In (by Roger Oakland)

Monday, January 16, 2017

Continuing Saga

To be honest I am a complete mess! *heavy sigh*  It is so hard to leave our church and honestly I don't want to, but I have to.  I spoke with my nursery co-worker yesterday.  She had not been to church in a month, so she had completely missed all that has happened in the past few weeks.  Thankfully, she has been going to a church near her home where her brother and his family go.  She said she has felt guilty for liking that church more than our church.  I told her it is probably of the Lord and then I told her the new direction our church has decided to go and the danger of it.  Our discussion went really well and now she can make changes for the better.  We are so sad to break up, but she works nearby where I live so no reason we can't get together for lunch when we can.

I've only told one other friend.  Most Christians are unaware of the dangers.  Granted, it is hard to keep up with the wiles of the enemy these days.  Anyway, my friend said she has been increasingly irritated with the worship music that is being played at our church.  She said she felt guilty about it, like she was being rebellious.  I told her that I was having the same issue and that maybe the Holy Spirit has been warning us.  My friend is a nurse and doesn't have much time to research and try different churches.  So she told me to let her know what church I ended up at so she can come too.  So we will see where the Lord leads.  So far we are have a Baptist church on the list.  They are close by and their statement of doctrine says they believe the scriptures are the sole authority to faith & practice.

There are other friends that I should share with, but I worry how they will respond to what I say.  I am leaving it in the hands of the Lord and waiting on His timing.  And honestly, right now I am so upset I am not in a good way.  I need time to calm down, chill out, focus and relax.  So here's to new adventures on the narrow road.

Sunday, January 15, 2017

The Response

I have studied up on the "purpose driven" thing enough to know that it is not the narrow path that Jesus talked about (Matthew 7:13-14).  Instead it is part of the wide path.  In review of 2016 our church leadership did some wide path stuff.  The good songs we used to sing have been replaced with music from groups such as Jesus Culture. There was the time that our pastors burned incense in a service.  And another time the band played the music so loud it was like we were at a rock concert.  One of our pastors stood up in service last year and praised the Azusa Now 2016 event.  A family in our congregation stood up to talk about Voice of the Martyrs ministry and said there would be a meeting after the service to know more.  Only a few people attended the meeting and none of our pastors showed up in support of it.  Now add in the "purpose driven" drivel and things are not looking good.  Jesus said to examine the fruit, because you will know a tree by it's fruit (Matthew 7:15-20).  Analysis: the fruit doesn't look good.   

Since our pastor said he wanted to meet with my hubby to discuss things, my hubby has been pushing for a date to meet, but as of yet no date has been set.  Our pastor said he would be sorry to see us go, but they are moving forward with this.  As he said in Sunday sermon the leadership has prayed about this and have decided that this is the way God wants them to go.  So in their opinion we are the ones going against God.  So not much to talk about when you put that spin on it and there probably won't be any meeting.  Anyway, we are going to attend church today, for one last time, as it is my turn to do nursery.  I want to let my nursery partner, whom I've worked with for years, know we are leaving and why.

I am so upset over the direction the church is going that I am barely sleeping.  I get a few hours here and there, but for the most part I am not sleeping.  In February it will be 7 years that we have been a part of this church.  I was thinking how we have been through so much with these people, the hardships with our sons, my surgery and complications afterwards, etc.  And all that comes to my mind right now are the words to a hymn:  All to Jesus I surrender, all to Him I freely give.  I will ever love and trust Him, in His presence daily live.

Here are a few links to messages I have listened to regarding the wide path:
The Purpose Driven Lie
Sandy & Tim
Chris Rosenbrough - Rick Warren

Friday, January 6, 2017

Letter Sent

Well, my hubby finished his 2nd letter to our pastors with links showing why PDL is not good.  So now we wait and see the response.  Been praying.  The response will determine what we do next.  I've been so sad about all of this, its like a bad dream, but it is real.

Monday, January 2, 2017

It's a New Year!

This year the holidays seemed to go by in a flash, actually I guess that is a good thing because for the last several years Thanksgiving & Christmas have not been my favorites. There have been some aspects of these holidays I have enjoyed, but somehow they seem to accentuate what I am missing.  I try to focus on the blessings, but when you have a loved one that is missing or you aren't getting along with, it is hard.  So I just do the best I can.  It seems the one thing that I can count on is getting sick at Christmas and Christmas 2016 was no exception.  The bright side is that I wasn't as sick as Christmas 2015.  And now we are in 2017 and I am actually looking forward what this year holds.

As far as our church situation, it has not gotten better.  My hubby wrote to our pastors and told them he does not like the direction they are going.  Only one of the pastors wrote back asking what is wrong with The Purpose Driven Life (PDL).  In his Sunday message he quoted the Purpose Drive Life and basically said he thinks the book rocks.  He also said that they have prayed about this and they feel this is the direction God wants them to go.  That's when you know things are bad because its our pastors that should be guarding and protecting the sheep from the wolves.  My hubby is trying to get a letter together with on-line links to show why the PDL is not good, but he is a bit hesitant as he doesn't feel the leadership will be open.

My hubby also contacted a godly man we know via You Tube.  A few years back he had to leave his church and he has since become a pastor.  Anyway, he has experience in these matters and was kind to give my hubby some advice.  He said that my hubby's letter will probably be met with disregard so beware.  He also said we have some time as PDL is mostly being taught in small groups, but when it starts seeping into the Sunday message (which it has) then we have to leave because we can't sit under blind guides.  Galatians 5:9 says, "A little leaven leavens the whole lump."  So 2017 is the year we begin our transition of leaving our church, visiting other churches and seeing where the Lord leads.