Chin Up - Keeping Calm & Carrying On

I have been enjoying the Olympics being in England.  The shots of the bicycle race going through that tunnel of green trees is gorgeous.  The shots of Big Ben and the Thames River...beautiful!  I hope someday I can go to England.  And then there is that saying that comes to mind.  You know the one...Keep calm and carry on.  Well, that is exactly what I am trying to do these days.

Things have not been going well with my son, Eric.  We found out that he is engaged.  He did not tell us, but he did post it on Facebook.  So people started to question us.  I nearly fainted when the news reached me.  Confronting him regarding this was a trip around the world.  First he said it was a hoax, then admitted they are engaged, but not even close to getting married, so therefore no date.  However, that is not stopping them from living as if married.  Over a period of weeks Eric has been increasingly angry.  There have been other things that have played out besides the engagement issue.  It is sad to say, but Eric has managed to estrange his brother and his parents.

So here I sit typing, trying to keep calm and carry on as I feel an overwhelming sense of bewilderment.  I hurt for my child.  I long to help him, but in his mind I am the cause of all his unhappiness.  I am so thankful to the Lord for daily providing me with the strength to carry on.  One of my biggest blessings is my dear husband.  I thank and praise the Lord for giving me such a wonderful blessing.  Today is our 29th wedding anniversary.  Thank you Lord for your love as shown through my blessed husband!

Nest is Emptying

It was the afternoon of Father's Day when Eric came home and decided to move out.  He packed up a number of things and left in a rush.  The next day he was back moving his bed out and various other items that Brandon and I had packed up for him.  For those of us left at home it was heartbreaking.

A number of things have been going down the past few months and not all of it good.  It all started with the addition of a new girlfriend.  Relations became increasingly strained and it seemed as if Eric was slipping into a black hole.  We all tried to pull him out, but the black hole won.  He is now living with his girlfriend (of 2 months) in her parents home.  I've heard from him via text messaging, but our communication is very limited.

Friends and family are questioning Eric's behavior as he doesn't seem like his usual self.  Since he is 18 there is not much we can do.  But we can pray.  If you feel led to pray, it would be much appreciated.   

Kindhearted Women

A kindhearted woman gains respect.  Proverbs 11:16

The Lord has blessed my life in many ways.  Everyday that is true, but there are some days when I choose not to see it that way.  It usually happens when I fix my eyes on my trials & tribulations.  Remember the story of Jesus walking on the water?  Peter wanted to walk on the water too, but the minute he fixed his eyes on the waves, he began to sink.  How do we keep from sinking?  By fixing our eyes on Jesus the author and finisher of our faith. And what is it that Jesus said we should do?  He said that we should wash each others feet.  We should come along side someone else that is struggling. Bear each others burdens, be a servant.

Since moving to Colorado, the Lord has opened doors to several friendships.  I have some amazing ladies in my life.  First there is Colette.  She and her husband are having money troubles, so they are having to sell their house of 15 years.  The fixing and packing has been overwhelming for her.  Second is my friend Bonnie, who lost her job and has a son that has been mixed up in drugs.  Third is my friend Tara who is an amazing school teacher. Sometimes all the rules and regulations of teaching had her bogged down.  And last, but not least, my friend Cindy who has been helping her husband with the struggles of his business.  All these women have their trials & tribulations.  All of them call out to the Lord for help.  What amazes me is that the Lord uses little old me to answer some of their prayers.

For instances, Bonnie prayed and asked the Lord for someone to go with her to visit her son in jail.  And the Lord laid it on my heart to tell her I would go with her.  Colette needed someone to help with her overgrown garden and when I stopped by for a visit we weeded it together.  Tara needed someone to spend individual time with each student reading and the Lord picked me.  And Cindy was in need of a friend to give her encouragement which the Lord has graciously allowed me to do.  I have to tell you, my cup is overflowing!!

Oh what a blessed God we serve, who uses us to lift others out of the waves of despair and at the same time lifts me.  Being a kindhearted woman is the best job in the world!

"When God blesses you, He rarely has you in mind." ~E. V. Hill

My Graduate...

This is my son Eric on his graduation day.  Not sure what he will do next.  Right now he is working as a bouncer for Jump Street, which is an indoor trampoline facility.  He recently had a review and got a good rating.  He got a raise and promotion.  He had an interview for a welding position.  Waiting to hear if he got the job.  We don't see much of Eric these days.  He is spending most of his free time with his girlfriend and working on the truck they bought together.  I've been shedding some tears...letting our children fly away from the nest is tough.

Health Update

Well, my new GP referred me on to a colorectal surgeon.  Yesterday I had a colonoscopy done.  He could not complete the scope due to a blockage at the site of the reconnection.  To get a picture of the rest of my bowel I had to go to the hospital and get a barium x-ray.  I felt ill afterward.  My dear hubby took me home to rest.  The doctor told us that the only way to handle this type of stricture is through surgery.  We have to make an appointment to have another consult and discuss options.  I will keep you posted.

Doctor Appt.

A nurse friend of mine told me about a doctor that she goes to.  I expressed to my friend my apprehension about doctors.  She told me her doctor is a hard worker and a patient listener.  So I am going to try her out.  The appointment is on my birthday...sigh...I certainly hope the Lord has a present for me in this.  I am sure that I will be full of nervous knots, but as Mark says I need to get this rolling.  I need to get something done about my tummy as I have lived 3 years with the pain and nausea.  Lately, the nausea part has been worse, especially every morning after eating breakfast.  Sometimes when I am driving it gets worse, sometimes I feel I am going to faint.  Just can't keep living like this.  I feel I've given it a good shot of trying to live with it.  It is hard trying to live my life feeling sick most everyday.

Update and Age

Well, it has been a month now that I have been in the boot.  On Sunday I was able to put a shoe on.  Mark and I took a spin outside...a short walk.  I limped and it hurt, so not ready to shed the boot just yet.  There is a bruise still healing on the top of my foot and my ankle feels uneasy.  I am able to walk around the house with just a wrap, no boot, so I am hopeful that soon I will be able to wear a shoe again.  Lately, we have been having beautiful sunny days here in Denver and I must admit, not being able to take a long walk has been a trial for me.

Life has slowed down.  Still not quite over that flu bug.  Mark and I are still struggling with sinus congestion and tiredness.  Otherwise we are doing fine.  Both of us wish that we could get to feeling like our usual selves.  My tummy issues continue.  I had a really bad attack on Saturday morning.  All I had was a cup of Earl Grey tea with milk and honey.  That is all it took for it to get in a knot.  It made me feel quite ill and at one point I felt as if I would pass out.  A nurse friend of mine told me about a doctor she goes to who is a listener.  So I am trying to get up the courage to go and see her.  It is really hard for me, I just want to runaway from it all.  In reality, I have been running away, however the problem just follows me. ;-)

Soon it will be my birthday (March 20th).  I am going to be bold...yes...I will be 51 years old.  I am sighing after typing that.  Gee whiz!...51...I am trying to take glory in it all.  There are positive ways to conquer the age thing.  Yes, if I look at it from the world's point of view I am doomed, all is lost...etc.  I want to glory in my gray (when I get it...haha...thanks Lord) and not fuss over wrinkles.  However, I must admit, I am fussing a bit over the wrinkles.  Sigh.  But the best thing is this...that the Lord is using me here on planet earth and I am getting closer to coming home day by day.